November 15, 2010
Patti’s Saga of an RV Rookie: or “Am I Gonna Hit the Green Board?”
“Am I gonna hit the green board?”
Try as I might, I couldn’t see a green board anywhere, let alone if my husband was going to hit one.
"Does this look like a green board to you?"
“What green board? I don’t see a green board! “ I knew I’d hate this backing up thing. Some of my earliest memories were of my Dad yelling out the car window back to mom, “Irene, you gotta be kidding me! You call that a foot?” I’ve turned into my mother. The hapless guider waving my hands wildly so it looked like I was doing something behind the trailer.
Ray’s head swiveled out the driver’s window , fleeting visions of “The Exorcist.” “The green board!” Unspoken aspersions on my intellect hung there like chads in a Florida voting booth. “I don’t wanna hit the green board!”
“I’m serious, Ray. I don’t even see a green board. Where the heck is it?”
He leaps out of the Explorer, index finger air spearing the “green board.” “See…the green board! I don’t want to back up and hit it!”
“Oh that? You mean that Astro Turf slab?” Never in a million years would it have occurred to me that particular slab was the green board in question. I was looking for something like a lime green 2 x 4 propped against a tree.
My maniacal laughter may have prompted campground neighbors to wonder if an hysterical woman had recently escaped from who-knows-where, or failed her treatment plan. Sometimes, I think my husband wonders, too.